“We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.”

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.

People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can’t do math.

Everyone smiles in the same language.

I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.

Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.

Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.

Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.

A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

If your kid needs a role model and you ain’t it, you’re both fucked.

The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.

So, have a little fun. Soon enough you’ll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.

There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.

If alcohol is legal, I don’t see why people still have a ban on marijuana.

I believe a leaf of grass is no less than the journey work of the stars.

If I am worth anything later, I am worth something now. For wheat is wheat, even if people think it is a grass in the beginning.

It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I’ll meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass the world is too full to talk about.

A single gentle rain makes the grass many shades greener.

When the wind blows,the grass bends.

Spring comes, and the grass grows by itself.