The wisest man I ever knew taught me something I never forgot.
GEORGE CARLINThe IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
More George Carlin Quotes
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The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
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I’ve never owned a telescope, but it’s something I’m thinking of looking into.
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Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
GEORGE CARLIN -
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
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The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
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Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?
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I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
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When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot’s hands.
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We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.
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The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
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It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
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The God excuse, the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument.
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If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
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If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
GEORGE CARLIN -
Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
GEORGE CARLIN