More from George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
George CarlinGeorge Carlin I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can’t do math.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin Everyone smiles in the same language.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
George CarlinGeorge Carlin If your kid needs a role model and you ain’t it, you’re both fucked.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin So, have a little fun. Soon enough you’ll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot’s hands.
George CarlinGeorge Carlin
Original quotes
From our community writers
I am the universe, and every possibility belongs to me.
Courtney PeppernellCourtney Peppernell The only thing that changed about you is me.
Elaine HaysElaine Hays He is my heaven and my hell. Serving passion and poison with the same spoon, and i am a sucker for a taste.
Laura Natoli-KearneyLaura Natoli-Kearney My mistakes tell me I am quite human, but my brief flashes of brilliance tell me I am divine, too.
Rachel WolchinRachel Wolchin She now finds solace in vanilla-scented daydreams, as her soul sings away in a musical symphony of humid breaths and well-favored smiles.
Megan LaoMegan Lao Some things won’t change-some things can’t.
Julia Kellogg HenryJulia Kellogg Henry My blood is fifty percent alcohol the other half was you.
Chris AllchinChris Allchin Darling, you don’t fear love, you fear of loving wrong.
C.R. ElliottC.R. Elliott
Meet the writers
More on blink
Lies are often truth-shaped. They’re only containers you must turn inside out and shake till the truth tumbles out, wide eyed and confused, blinking in a light it never thought it would see.
Nikita GillNikita Gill I was literally reduced to basic breath and blinks while she inhabited my vessel and told her story through me.
Aisha HindsAisha Hinds So for them 15 years is a blink of an eye. I am nothing but grateful.
Adriana TrigianiAdriana Trigiani Tell us please, what treatment in an emergency is administered by ear?”….I met his gaze and I did not blink. “Words of comfort,” I said to my father.
Abraham VergheseAbraham Verghese Carry on, then, if only for the moment that it takes a tiny galaxy to blink!
Wislawa SzymborskaWislawa Szymborska Carry on regardless. Who cares what they think? They lay in wait and wonder; what if? Success for you coming fast and thick, don’t blink.
Gerard GleesonGerard Gleeson I do not fear death. But I do, a deathbed regret. Life is a blink of an eye. One day forever closed, lest you forget.
Gerard GleesonGerard Gleeson I am an arrow – Put me in your bow and let fly. Let this story go by in the blink of an eye.
Bisma IjazBisma Ijaz