The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
GEORGE CARLIN
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
More George Carlin Quotes
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The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
GEORGE CARLIN -
What do dogs do on their day off?; Can’t lie around – that’s their job!
GEORGE CARLIN -
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
GEORGE CARLIN -
With the proper training, I could’ve been an evil genius.
GEORGE CARLIN -
There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
GEORGE CARLIN -
We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.
GEORGE CARLIN -
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now it’s trying to save its body.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
GEORGE CARLIN