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GEORGE CARLINI would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
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Let a smile be your umbrella, and you’ll end up with a face full of rain.
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Religion is just mind control.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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People always tell me “Have a nice day.” Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to have a crappy day?
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Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
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Meow means woof in cat.
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A good motto to live by: ‘Always try not to get killed.
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People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
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I don’t have hobbies; hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
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If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
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Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
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I’ve never owned a telescope, but it’s something I’m thinking of looking into.
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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
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The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
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May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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It’s important in life if you don’t give a shit. It can help you a lot.
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Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
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I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
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Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
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I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
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If your kid needs a role model and you ain’t it, you’re both fucked.
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you’re gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
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If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
GEORGE CARLIN