Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
BILL COSBYNobody ever says, Can I have your beets?
More Bill Cosby Quotes
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Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge.
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You can never give complete authority and overall power to anyone until trust can be proven.
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Man can not live by bread alone, he must have peanut butter.
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Never forget that the devil is there 24/7 too. He’s very, very busy.
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Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.
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When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first?
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And of course, when you see your brother in the toilet bowl there’s a little voice that say, ‘I wonder where he would go if it hadn’t been for his head.
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Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice.
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The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
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Mediocre people are the most dangerous people in the world.
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The Internet is like Hitler they think they are getting rid of the problem but they’re not.
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The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.
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I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
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In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
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The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.
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Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
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Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.
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Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
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And so the dentist says ‘Rinse.’ So you lean over, and you’re lookin’ at this miniature toilet bowl.
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Only stupid one’s.
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A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.
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You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don’t want to see the dog doing them.
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The serve was invented so that the net could play.
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I’m supposed to figure out if the glass is half full or half empty, I told her. Without a moment’s hesitation, in a split second, my grandmother shrugged and said: It depends on if you’re drinking or pouring.
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Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.
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Nobody ever says, Can I have your beets?
BILL COSBY