That’s why ears have cartilage, to keep them from flapping.
BILL COSBYHuman beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.
More Bill Cosby Quotes
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A grandchild is God’s reward for raising a child.
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Take your bottom lip and pull it over your head.
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As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by survival of the fittest.
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The serve was invented so that the net could play.
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Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.
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Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.
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I’m not the boss of my house. I don’t know how I lost it, I don’t know when I lost it, I don’t really think I ever had it. But I’ve seen the boss’s job and I don’t want it!
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Nobody ever says, Can I have your beets?
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All parents experience the same problems.
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The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.
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Old is always fifteen years from now.
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Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.
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Human beings are the only creatures on earth who allow their kids to come back home.
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The essence of childhood, of course, is play, which my friends and I did endlessly on streets that we reluctantly shared with traffic.
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Suddenly, this romantic agony was enriched by a less romantic one: I had to go to the bathroom. Needless to say, I couldn’t let her know about this urge, for great lovers never did such things. The answer to Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo? Was not In the men’s room, Julie.
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A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.
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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
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You can never give complete authority and overall power to anyone until trust can be proven.
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I often try to tell kids to think about all the people who love you, don’t cry over the one person who doesn’t.
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Man can not live by bread alone, he must have peanut butter.
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People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what’s bitter and move on.
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Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you’re pouring, or drinking.
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Decide that you want it more than you’re afraid of it.
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If you know what you want, you will recognize it when you see it.
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
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Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
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