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I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.

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Dog Politics Reason

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
WILL ROGERS

Account Democracy Government Nation People
If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn’t have to advertise them.
WILL ROGERS

Advertisement Amount Improvement Money
Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.
WILL ROGERS

Chair Deserve Funny High Five Face People
Always drink upstream from the herd.
WILL ROGERS

Drink Funny Leadership
What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.
WILL ROGERS

Clean Country Mind Need
People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.
WILL ROGERS

Fly People Rage
It is awful hard to get people interested in corruption unless they can get some of it.
WILL ROGERS

Awful Corruption Interest People
Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
WILL ROGERS

Inspirational Right Sit Track
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
WILL ROGERS

Death Grandfather Peace Scream Sleep
There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
WILL ROGERS

Funny Humor Theory Woman
Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
WILL ROGERS

Change Comedy People Politics Serious
Make crime pay. Become a lawyer.
WILL ROGERS

Crime Lawyer One Liner Pay
Do the best you can, and don’t take life too serious.
WILL ROGERS

Inspirational Life Serious Work Hard
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
WILL ROGERS

Association Learning Man People Reading Smart
Be thankful we’re not getting all the government we’re paying for.
WILL ROGERS

Government Pay Thankful
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
WILL ROGERS

Finding Life Rush Save Time
A fool and his money are soon elected.
WILL ROGERS

Fools Money
Buy land. They ain’t making any more of the stuff.
WILL ROGERS

Buy Land Stuff
The more ignorant you are, the quicker you fight.
WILL ROGERS

Fight Ignorant Quick
You’ve got to go out on a limb sometimes because that’s where the fruit is.
WILL ROGERS

Fruit Hard Time Inspirational Struggle
It’s not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
WILL ROGERS

Business Cost Count Man Pay
We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
WILL ROGERS

Civilization Learning Recognize Rights True
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, ‘How is the president?’
WILL ROGERS

Country Job Morning President
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that’s an alibi for my ignorance.
WILL ROGERS

Ignorance Newspaper Reading
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
WILL ROGERS

Deep Different Ignorance One Liner Reality Subject
Worrying is like paying on a debt that may never come due.
WILL ROGERS

Debt Due never Pay Worry
If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
WILL ROGERS

Politics Truth

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