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Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.

Will Rogers

An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
WILL ROGERS

Cry Laugh Onion People Vegetable
It is awful hard to get people interested in corruption unless they can get some of it.
WILL ROGERS

Awful Corruption Interest People
The short memories of the American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.
WILL ROGERS

Country Office Politics
Too many people spend money they haven’t earned to buy things they don’t want to impress people they don’t like.
WILL ROGERS

Buy Earn Human Nature Impress Money People
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
WILL ROGERS

Association Learning Man People Reading Smart
Always drink upstream from the herd.
WILL ROGERS

Drink Funny Leadership
What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.
WILL ROGERS

Clean Country Mind Need
If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
WILL ROGERS

Politics Truth
We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
WILL ROGERS

Civilization Learning Recognize Rights True
There is one guaranteed formula for failure, and that is to try to please everyone.
WILL ROGERS

Failure Formula Guarantee Please Try
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
WILL ROGERS

Account Democracy Government Nation People
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don’t have for something they don’t need.
WILL ROGERS

Advertisement Convince Money Need People Spend
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
WILL ROGERS

Deep Different Ignorance One Liner Reality Subject
We can’t all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.
WILL ROGERS

Applaud Hero Sit
Diplomacy is the art of saying ‘Nice doggie’ until you can find a rock.
WILL ROGERS

Art Diplomacy Finding Rock
If you want to be successful, it’s just this simple. Know what you are doing. Love what you are doing. And believe in what you are doing.
WILL ROGERS

Believe Inspirational Love Success Want

Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.

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Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.

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