“Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.”

Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.

You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.

A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

I intend to live forever, or die trying.

Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.

Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy

Somebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.

I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while

Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.

From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

Pain is important: how we evade it, how we succumb to it, how we deal with it, how we transcend it.

Never underestimate a man’s ability to make you feel guilty for his mistakes.

Action is more generally understood than words.

Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

Solving big problems is easier than solving little ones.

Everyone you meet knows something you don’t know but need to know. Learn from them.

Life can always change, you have to adjust.