Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
GROUCHO MARXHollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
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If you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.
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Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
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All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
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If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
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Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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Why, look at me. I’ve worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
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Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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All geniuses die young.
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I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
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She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
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Anything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
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Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
GROUCHO MARX