Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARXWhoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARX -
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
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No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
GROUCHO MARX -
My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX -
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.
GROUCHO MARX -
I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
GROUCHO MARX -
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX -
A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
GROUCHO MARX