“Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while”

I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.

Room service? Send up a larger room.

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.

I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!

We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!

All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.

I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.

A very interesting theory makes no sense at all.

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.

If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.

Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.

Iran is going to get between $50 to $55 billion in oil revenue, which is unheard of in the history of the revolution.

The 2.5 billion adults [around the world] without access to financial services are disproportionately women and young people.

They are simply not capable of promoting the indigenous economy. Many billions of dollars flooded into Afghanistan, but without any significant effect.

At the end of the day, it’s hard to win against the NFL. It’s a billion-dollar business, it’s hard to win against it.

Obamacare is a private mandate that will drive billions to the insurance industry, much like the auto insurance mandate.

White-collar crime has been marketed – billions of dollars have been put in to have us be bored by it.

Terrorism, and political chaos that have characterized the beginning of the 21st Century.

The new naval treaty permits the United States to spend a billion dollars on warships-a sum greater than has been accumulated by all our endowed institutions of learning in their entire history.