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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.

Related Topics

Event Eyes Happiness Inspirational Morning Myself Power Present Unhappiness

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX

Exception Face Forget Humour
I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
GROUCHO MARX

Insult One Liner Respect
When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.
GROUCHO MARX

Best Friend Friendship Funny Goodness Jail Try
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX

Bless Crack Light One Liner
I don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
GROUCHO MARX

Dreamss Hairs Nurse Red Romance
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX

Attitude Insult One Liner Remind Talk Time
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARX

Book Fools Trouble Writing Yourself
Any place I hang my head is home.
GROUCHO MARX

Hang Head Home One Liner Place
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX

Funny Girlfriend Meet Naughty Wife
Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX

Healing Inspirational Life One Liner Time Wound
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
GROUCHO MARX

Doubt Interfere Marriage People Romance Sex Wife
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX

Billion Birthday Cells Life One Liner
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX

Drunk Febuary Morning
Humour is reason gone mad.
GROUCHO MARX

Humour Madness One Liner Reason
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARX

Die Forever Inspirational One Liner Positive Try
Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX

Birthday Live Old Problem
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX

Cause Chief Divorce Marriage One Liner
Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
GROUCHO MARX

Attitude Down Human Nature Myself Pick
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX

Education Heart Heart Beat Listen Metabolism Study
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARX

Humour Judge Jury Marriage One Liner
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX

Cause Chief Divorce Marriage One Liner
If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARX

Hear Memories Past Stop Story
Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
GROUCHO MARX

Funny Humour Mind Smoking
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX

Human Nature Humour Important One Liner Speak
Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
GROUCHO MARX

Advance Luck One Liner Welcome Women
I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX

Club Freedom Member
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX

Admit Age Born Early Life

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