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We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.

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Drunk Febuary Morning

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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
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Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
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Humour is reason gone mad.
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Go, and never darken my towels again.
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The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
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Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
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Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
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I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
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