Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARXWho says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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I don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
GROUCHO MARX -
Room service? Send up a larger room.
GROUCHO MARX -
Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX -
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
GROUCHO MARX -
No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
GROUCHO MARX -
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX -
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARX -
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GROUCHO MARX -
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX -
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX -
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARX -
Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
GROUCHO MARX