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Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.

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Dead Funny Man One Liner Stop Watch

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
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Advance Luck One Liner Welcome Women
You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
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Huff Humour Leave
He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don’t let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
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Demotivate Idiot Insult Life Stupidity
Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
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Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
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Man One Liner Success Victory Wife Woman
All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
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Born Democracy People Republic
I don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
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Dreamss Hairs Nurse Red Romance
Don’t look now, but there’s one man too many in this room, and I think it’s you.
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If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
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Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
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I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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Enough Learning Mistake Yourself
We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.
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Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
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Birthday Live Old Problem
No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
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Best Friend Deep Failure One Liner Unhappy
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
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I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
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Crazy Decent Life Meal Place Reality
Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
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Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX

Dead Funny Man One Liner Stop Watch
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX

Calm Deep Despair Laughter One Liner Peace
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
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Closer Holding Love One Liner Romance

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