I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
GROUCHO MARXAll people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
-
-
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX -
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX -
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
GROUCHO MARX -
I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
GROUCHO MARX -
She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
GROUCHO MARX -
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
GROUCHO MARX -
Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX -
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARX -
Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARX -
Humour is reason gone mad.
GROUCHO MARX -
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX -
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX -
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX -
All geniuses die young.
GROUCHO MARX -
Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARX -
Any place I hang my head is home.
GROUCHO MARX -
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX -
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX -
She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARX -
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX