Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
GROUCHO MARXDo you mind if I don’t smoke?
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
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She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
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We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.
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I intend to live forever, or die trying.
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
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Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
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Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
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From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
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Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
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Room service? Send up a larger room.
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Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARX