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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

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Always Children Choose Home Nice One Rest

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.
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Beneath Breast Knee Law Left Mother Out Pain Trick Tuned
You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors!
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Humble Keep Know Mirror
They just elected me Mis Phonograph Record of 1966. They discovered my measurements were 33 1/2, 45, 78!
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Country Discover Elect Eyewear Just Measurement People Person
I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.
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Afford All Children Move Them Thing Want
I never made `Who’s Who,’ but I’m featured in `What’s That?’
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Feature Made never That What
You know you’re old if they have discontinued your blood type.
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Blood Discontinue Know Type
You know you’re old when your walker has an airbag.
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Airbag Now Old Walkertr
I serve dinner in three phases: serve the food, clear the table, bury the dead.
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Bury Clear Dead Dinner Food Phase Serve Table Three
You know you’re old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you’re barefoot.
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Aligator Barefoot Compliment Know Shoe Someone
I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet.
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Ask Country Football Good Hairdresser Helmet Look People Person Say
Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Always Children Choose Home Nice One Rest
Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
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Always Before Down Drink Fall Friend Health
If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
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Beaten Before Him Husband Lick Mixer Want
Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
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Love Man Marry Money Nothing Tennis
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge.
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Avoid Beget Children Desire Entirely Mean Poverty Single Something Violence
I’m eighteen years behind in my ironing.
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Anybody Behind Doing Eighteen Iron Know Now Use Year

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