black
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Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.

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Age Glove Love Old Sport Through

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Age Back Do Go More Than
If my jeans could talk, they’d plead for mercy.
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Jealous Mercy Pilead Talk
I’m eighteen years behind in my ironing. There’s no use doing it now, it doesn’t fit anybody I know.
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Anybody Behind Doing Eighteen Iron Know Now Use Year
I was so wrinkled I could screw my hats on.
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Hat On Screw Wrinkle
Aim high, and you won’t shoot your foot off.
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Aim Fool High Off Shoot
The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth.
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Bad Earn Ever Kid Last Lose Money Old Teeth Thing
The doctor looked my body over. I said: Is there any hope? He said: Yes. Reincarnation.
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Body Doctor Hope Look Reincarnation Said Yes
You know what keeps me humble? Mirrors!
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Humble Keep Know Mirror
They just elected me Mis Phonograph Record of 1966. They discovered my measurements were 33 1/2, 45, 78!
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Country Discover Elect Eyewear Just Measurement People Person
I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along – but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
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Along Always Easy Only Same Tell Understand
Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle – keep away from children.
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Advice Away Bottle Children Follow Keep Transquilzer Work
Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.
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Ask Country Once Out People Player Room
Tennis is like marrying for money. Love means nothing.
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Love Man Marry Money Nothing Tennis
self-pity is better than none.
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Better Ity None Self
Do not taste food while you’re cooking. You may lose your nerve to serve it.
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Cook Food Lose May never Serve Taste
Next to gold and jewelry, health is the most important thing you can have.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Gold Have Health Important Jewelry Next Things

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