Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
MARK TWAINAlways acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
MARK TWAINAll right, then, I’ll go to hell.
MARK TWAINEducation consists mainly of what we have unlearned.
MARK TWAINWhen angry, count four. When very angry, swear.
MARK TWAINWorrying is like paying a debt you don’t owe.
MARK TWAINClothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
MARK TWAINIf you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
MARK TWAINIt takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.
MARK TWAINMy books are water; those of the great geniuses is wine. Everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAINThe dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man’s.
MARK TWAINYou can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
MARK TWAINLoyalty to country always. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
MARK TWAINThe right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
MARK TWAINIf you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
MARK TWAINThe human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
MARK TWAINOf all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it.
MARK TWAIN