Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.
MARK TWAINEducation: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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The most interesting information come from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.
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Loyalty to country always. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.
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When angry, count four. When very angry, swear.
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Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
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Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
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Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
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If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
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I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!
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In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards.
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Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
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There’s one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he’s crooked.
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There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man’s notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
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Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
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A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.
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Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
MARK TWAIN