There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man’s notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
MARK TWAINIn the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.
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Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.
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Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
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What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
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Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.
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I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
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A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it.
MARK TWAIN -
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
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The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
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If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
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Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
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Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
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If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be – a Christian.
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There’s one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he’s crooked.
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The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.
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It’s easier to fool people than to convince them that they have been fooled.
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If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
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Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
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Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
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The secret to getting ahead is getting started.
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Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
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The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.
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Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
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Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.
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A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.
MARK TWAIN