I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.
MARK TWAINThe two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.
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April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.
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Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
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In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards.
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I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!
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There’s one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he’s crooked.
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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
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The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.
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The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.
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When angry, count four. When very angry, swear.
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Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
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I haven’t any right to criticize books, and I don’t do it except when I hate them.
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Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.
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The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.
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Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
MARK TWAIN