Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
GROUCHO MARXIf you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX -
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
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A very interesting theory makes no sense at all.
GROUCHO MARX -
I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARX -
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
GROUCHO MARX -
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX -
A year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
GROUCHO MARX -
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX -
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX -
Room service? Send up a larger room.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX