Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARXEveryone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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I intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARX -
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX -
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARX -
I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
GROUCHO MARX -
Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
GROUCHO MARX -
A year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
GROUCHO MARX -
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX -
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
GROUCHO MARX -
We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARX -
A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX -
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX -
Why don’t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
GROUCHO MARX