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My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.

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Children Love Mother

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Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
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Die Halfway Heaven One Liner West
Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
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Funny Humour Mind Smoking
You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
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If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
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Don’t look now, but there’s one man too many in this room, and I think it’s you.
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Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
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Control Fate Fortune Life Man Women
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
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I must admit, I was born at an early age.
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Admit Age Born Early Life
Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
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Birthday Live Old Problem
Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
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Anything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
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Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
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Attitude Life Principles Rules
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
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Humour is reason gone mad.
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We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
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