Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARXMy mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
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Humour is reason gone mad.
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Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
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We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX -
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARX -
I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX -
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
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Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
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I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARX