I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
GEORGE CARLINI don’t have hobbies; hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
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Life is tough, then you die.
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The God excuse, the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument.
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Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
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A good motto to live by: ‘Always try not to get killed.
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There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.
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Religion is like a pair of shoes. Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.
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If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
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Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
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Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.
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Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.
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Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
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Religion is just mind control.
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I don’t have hobbies; hobbies cost money. Interests are quite free.
GEORGE CARLIN