The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
GEORGE CARLINElectricity is really just organized lightning.
More George Carlin Quotes
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There’s no present. There’s only the immediate future and the recent past.
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Religion is like a pair of shoes. Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.
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Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
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Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.
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The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
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There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
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Is there another word for synonym?
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If we could only find out who’s in charge, we could kill him.
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Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
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How can he be perfect? Everything he ever makes, dies.
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I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
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I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
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It’s important in life if you don’t give a shit. It can help you a lot.
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The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
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Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
GEORGE CARLIN