It’s never just a game when you’re winning.
GEORGE CARLINLet a smile be your umbrella, and you’ll end up with a face full of rain.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Is there another word for synonym?
GEORGE CARLIN -
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
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I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Don’t confuse me with those who cling to hope.
GEORGE CARLIN -
How can he be perfect? Everything he ever makes, dies.
GEORGE CARLIN -
I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
GEORGE CARLIN -
Don’t give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If we could only find out who’s in charge, we could kill him.
GEORGE CARLIN -
The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
GEORGE CARLIN -
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Meow means woof in cat.
GEORGE CARLIN -
People always tell me “Have a nice day.” Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to have a crappy day?
GEORGE CARLIN -
Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now it’s trying to save its body.
GEORGE CARLIN -
With the proper training, I could’ve been an evil genius.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
GEORGE CARLIN -
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
GEORGE CARLIN -
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
GEORGE CARLIN -
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
GEORGE CARLIN -
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
GEORGE CARLIN -
Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
GEORGE CARLIN