Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
GEORGE CARLINOne good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
More George Carlin Quotes
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If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you’re gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
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Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?
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The older you get, the better you realize you were.
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The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
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Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
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Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.
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If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
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By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
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Is there another word for synonym?
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The safest place to be during an earthquake would be in a stationary store.
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A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
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One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
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Although the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other’s picture.
GEORGE CARLIN