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George Carlin Quote - What do dogs do on their day off?; Can’t lie around – that’s their job!

What do dogs do on their day off?; Can’t lie around – that’s their job!

Related Topics

Dog Funny Inspirational Job Lying

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
GEORGE CARLIN

Arrange Beat Failure One Liner
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
GEORGE CARLIN

Earn One Liner People Self Love
I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
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Ideas Suck Trouble
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
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Committment Friendship Maintain Murder People Reason Victim
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
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Goodness Music One Liner Religion
Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.
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Bull Shit Life School Simplicity Teaching
Pardon me I’ve got nothing to say.
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Attitude Myself One Liner Pardon
A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
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Blink Cat Hammer Humour One Liner
Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
GEORGE CARLIN

Alcohol Drinking Fuck Pregnant Warniing Women
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
GEORGE CARLIN

Acceptance Attitude Humour Lying Myself Reason Truth
If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
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Funny Homeless Humour Naked Shell
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
GEORGE CARLIN

Disappointment Ideal One Liner Person
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
GEORGE CARLIN

Average Person Realize Stupidity
Isn’t making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?
GEORGE CARLIN

Funny Humour Snoking Swimming
Is there another word for synonym?
GEORGE CARLIN

Funny Humour Synonym
There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions, and wooooords.
GEORGE CARLIN

Bad Funny Humour Intention Philosophy Positive

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