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George Carlin Quote - One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

Related Topics

Alcohol Floor Funny One Liner Tequilla

Bagwalas

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
GEORGE CARLIN

Alcohol Drinking Fuck Pregnant Warniing Women
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
GEORGE CARLIN

Group Man Member Pieces Symbol Wood
Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
GEORGE CARLIN

Bomb Inspirational Life Name Risk Scratch
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
GEORGE CARLIN

Consider Kill Personality Situation
The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
GEORGE CARLIN

Fuck People Planet
People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can’t do math.
GEORGE CARLIN

Acceptance Handwriting Love Maths People
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?
GEORGE CARLIN

Crime Criminal Fight Fire Freedom
I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
GEORGE CARLIN

Bagpipe Crack Hook Humour People Play
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
GEORGE CARLIN

Goodness Music One Liner Religion
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
GEORGE CARLIN

Funny House Humour Place Stuff
I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better.
GEORGE CARLIN

Deep Inspirational Man Myself Shoes Sorry
Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that’s twice as big as it needs to be.
GEORGE CARLIN

Big Emptiness Glass People Perspective Sad
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
GEORGE CARLIN

Committment Friendship Maintain Murder People Reason Victim
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
GEORGE CARLIN

Electricity Light One Liner Organise
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
GEORGE CARLIN

Fight One Liner Peace Screw Sex Virgin
Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.
GEORGE CARLIN

Age Hell Humour One Liner Price Wisdom

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