Everyone smiles in the same language.
GEORGE CARLINThe caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
More George Carlin Quotes
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If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
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People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.
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Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away.
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Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
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The main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
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People can’t seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure.
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Let a smile be your umbrella, and you’ll end up with a face full of rain.
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Life is tough, then you die.
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Although the photographer and the art thief were close friends, neither had ever taken the other’s picture.
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I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
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The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
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By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
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Always do whatever’s next.
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If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
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Religion is like drugs, it destroys the thinking mind.
GEORGE CARLIN