What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
MARK TWAINNever put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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Be good and you will be lonesome.
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Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.
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Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
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The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
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The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.
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Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
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Classic – a book which people praise and don’t read.
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In the first place God made idiots. This was for practice. Then he made school boards.
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Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
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Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.
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Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.
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Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
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Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it.
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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
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Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
MARK TWAIN