If voting made any difference they wouldn’t let us do it.
MARK TWAINIf animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
MARK TWAIN -
I’ve lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
MARK TWAIN -
Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
MARK TWAIN -
I have found out that there ain’t no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.
MARK TWAIN -
If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN -
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
MARK TWAIN -
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
MARK TWAIN -
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.
MARK TWAIN -
Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
MARK TWAIN -
Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
MARK TWAIN -
It’s better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt.
MARK TWAIN -
Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.
MARK TWAIN -
A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN -
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.
MARK TWAIN -
In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.
MARK TWAIN -
Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.
MARK TWAIN -
My books are water; those of the great geniuses is wine. Everybody drinks water.
MARK TWAIN -
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
MARK TWAIN -
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
MARK TWAIN -
When angry, count four. When very angry, swear.
MARK TWAIN -
I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.
MARK TWAIN -
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.
MARK TWAIN -
There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.
MARK TWAIN -
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
MARK TWAIN -
If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
MARK TWAIN -
Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
MARK TWAIN
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