One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim.
GEORGE CARLINIf you have selfish, ignorant citizens, you’re gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life.
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By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
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Everyone smiles in the same language.
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With the proper training, I could’ve been an evil genius.
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I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
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People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can’t do math.
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So, have a little fun. Soon enough you’ll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family.
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Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
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I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
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I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. It’s so fuckin’ heroic.
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I’ll bet there aren’t too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes.
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Electricity is really just organized lightning.
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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
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Is there another word for synonym?
GEORGE CARLIN