Some people have no idea what they’re doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.
GEORGE CARLINThe caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
More George Carlin Quotes
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Life gets really simple once you cut out all the bull shit they teach you in school.
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I’ve never owned a telescope, but it’s something I’m thinking of looking into.
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If we could only find out who’s in charge, we could kill him.
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Sometimes a little brain damage can help.
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Always do whatever’s next.
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Meow means woof in cat.
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When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot’s hands.
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A cat will blink when struck with a hammer.
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Everyone smiles in the same language.
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Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers.
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
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If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
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How can he be perfect? Everything he ever makes, dies.
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The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
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The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.
GEORGE CARLIN