I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
SPIKE MILLIGANMy father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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I’m Irish. We think sideways.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
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You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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I told you I was sick.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
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In the human race today, you came last.
SPIKE MILLIGAN






