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I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

Rodney Dangerfield

Related Topics

Bath Hate Parent Radio Toast Toy

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Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Acting Del Delicate Mask Put Very
My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.
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Again Boyfriend Broke Her Marriage Trock Up Wife
One year they asked me to be poster boy – for birth control.
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Ask Birth Boy Control One Poster Year
Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
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Country Dog Every Leave Pyramid Room Some
Men who do things without being told draw the most wages.
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Being Do Draw Men Most Thing Told Wage
My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.
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All Antier Chocolate Cook Got Mae Mouse Stuck Throat Wife
I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.
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Get Honest No Politician Respect Run
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.
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Crazy Opinion Psychiatrist Said Second
Life is just a bowl of pits.
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Bowl Just Life Pit
My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
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Calendar Day Get Jealous Look May Other Ridiculous Want Wife
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
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Father Finger Kidnap More Piece Proof Remember Sent Time Want
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Bath Hate Parent Radio Toast Toy
I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.
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Dog Family Found Look Three Tree
When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
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Cat Cover Kept Me Play Sandbox Up
I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
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Interrupt Spoken Wife Year
A girl phoned me the other day and said… ‘Come on over, there’s nobody home.’ I went over. Nobody was home.
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Another Come Day Girl Home Nobody Over Phone

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