Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARXI never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX -
Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX -
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX -
Somebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.
GROUCHO MARX -
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
GROUCHO MARX -
While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
GROUCHO MARX -
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARX -
I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX -
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX






