Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARXI intend to live forever, or die trying.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARX -
Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
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I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
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I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
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Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
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Anything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
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Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
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All geniuses die young.
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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
GROUCHO MARX






