I love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
GROUCHO MARXI love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
GROUCHO MARXIf I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
GROUCHO MARXMilitary intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARXI’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARXAll geniuses die young.
GROUCHO MARXEveryone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARXDon’t look now, but there’s one man too many in this room, and I think it’s you.
GROUCHO MARXWhy don’t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
GROUCHO MARXPaying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARXMarriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARXDo you mind if I don’t smoke?
GROUCHO MARXShe’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
GROUCHO MARXWell, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
GROUCHO MARXMy mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARXSome people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
GROUCHO MARXI find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
GROUCHO MARX