She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
GROUCHO MARXSomebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
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I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX -
You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARX -
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
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I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
Don’t look now, but there’s one man too many in this room, and I think it’s you.
GROUCHO MARX -
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX -
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARX -
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
GROUCHO MARX -
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARX -
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX