All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
GROUCHO MARXIf you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
-
-
Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
GROUCHO MARX -
Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
GROUCHO MARX -
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GROUCHO MARX -
Humour is reason gone mad.
GROUCHO MARX -
Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX -
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX -
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARX -
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX -
Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX -
I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
GROUCHO MARX -
Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARX