Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
GROUCHO MARXIf you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
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Somebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
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The only real laughter comes from despair.
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She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
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When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
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My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
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From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
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I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
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I must admit, I was born at an early age.
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Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARX