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Do you mind if I don’t smoke?

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Funny Humour Mind Smoking

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX

Healing Inspirational Life One Liner Time Wound
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX

Dead Funny Man One Liner Stop Watch
She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
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Father Funny Humour Plastic Surgeon Surgeon Women
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX

Drunk Febuary Morning
All geniuses die young.
GROUCHO MARX

Die Genius One Liner Young
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX

Admit Age Born Early Life
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
GROUCHO MARX

Animal Black Cat Cross Funny Humour Path
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
GROUCHO MARX

Closer Holding Love One Liner Romance
She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
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Funny Love Man Myself
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX

Lucky Person Pool Swimming Underwater
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
GROUCHO MARX

Elephant Funny Humour Morning Pajama
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX

Funny Missing One Liner Women
I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX

Club Freedom Member
I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX

Exception Face Forget Humour
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
GROUCHO MARX

Book Education Reading Television
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARX

Book Fools Trouble Writing Yourself

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