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Do you mind if I don’t smoke?

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Funny Humour Mind Smoking

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
GROUCHO MARX

Attitude Down Human Nature Myself Pick
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
GROUCHO MARX

Animal Black Cat Cross Funny Humour Path
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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Enough Learning Mistake Yourself
Humour is reason gone mad.
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Humour Madness One Liner Reason
Don’t look now, but there’s one man too many in this room, and I think it’s you.
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Love Man Romance Room
Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
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Die Halfway Heaven One Liner West
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
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Funny Missing One Liner Women
Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
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Age Birthday Interesting Subject
Go, and never darken my towels again.
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Angry Funny One Liner Towel
Time wounds all heels.
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Healing Inspirational Life One Liner Time Wound
When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.
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Best Friend Friendship Funny Goodness Jail Try
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
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Alcohol Beer Believe Funny
My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
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Children Love Mother
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
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Funny Leadership Man Women
From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
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Book Humour Laughter Moments Read
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
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Lucky Person Pool Swimming Underwater

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