Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARXThe only real laughter comes from despair.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
-
-
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
GROUCHO MARX -
While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARX -
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX -
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX -
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX -
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARX -
Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
GROUCHO MARX -
A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX -
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX -
Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX -
A year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
GROUCHO MARX