Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARXPaying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
GROUCHO MARXYesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARXQuote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
GROUCHO MARXA child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
GROUCHO MARXOnly one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARXA hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
GROUCHO MARXA very interesting theory makes no sense at all.
GROUCHO MARXSomebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.
GROUCHO MARXAnything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
GROUCHO MARXMilitary intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARXAge is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
GROUCHO MARXMilitary justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARXAnyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARXBlessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARXI was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARXI don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
GROUCHO MARX