The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GROUCHO MARXWell, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
GROUCHO MARX -
Humour is reason gone mad.
GROUCHO MARX -
She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
GROUCHO MARX -
Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
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Somebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.
GROUCHO MARX -
Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX -
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you write about yourself the slightest deviation makes you realize instantly that there may be honor among thieves, but you are just a dirty liar.
GROUCHO MARX -
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve been looking for a girl like you – not you, but a girl like you.
GROUCHO MARX -
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
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Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
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Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
GROUCHO MARX






