Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARXIf you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX -
Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
GROUCHO MARX -
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX -
We left New York drunk and early on the morning of February second.
GROUCHO MARX -
I only write first editions.
GROUCHO MARX -
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
GROUCHO MARX -
Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
GROUCHO MARX -
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve been looking for a girl like you – not you, but a girl like you.
GROUCHO MARX -
Anything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
GROUCHO MARX -
Why don’t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
GROUCHO MARX