Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
GROUCHO MARXA hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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All geniuses die young.
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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
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Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
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Room service? Send up a larger room.
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Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.
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I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
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Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
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Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.
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Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted.
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If you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
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Why, look at me. I’ve worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
GROUCHO MARX